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Working with Trauma and its Effects in Therapy

Traumatic experiences can leave a lasting imprint on how people remember, feel, and experience the world around them. For some, the effects are immediate and recognisable. For others, they emerge more quietly over time, showing up as anxiety, emotional numbness, difficulties in relationships, or a persistent sense of being on edge.

 

One of the distinctive features of trauma is how memories are experienced. Rather than feeling like events from the past, they can remain vivid and immediate, as though they are happening again in the present. There may be little sense of distance between then and now. This can be exhausting and unsettling, particularly when memories intrude unexpectedly or are triggered by situations that feel hard to predict or control.

 

Alongside this, some people find themselves constantly scanning for danger, feeling tense, alert, or unable to fully relax. Others notice the opposite: a sense of disconnection from feelings, from the body, or from parts of daily life, especially during moments of stress. These responses are not signs of weakness or failure. They are ways the mind and body has adapted in order to survive experiences that felt overwhelming at the time.

Complex trauma and post-traumatic stress

Trauma does not only arise from single, clearly defined events. It can also develop through repeated or prolonged experiences, particularly where safety, care, or emotional attunement were inconsistent or absent. This is sometimes described as complex trauma.

 

Whether trauma is linked to specific events or to longer-term relational experiences, its effects often shape how people relate to themselves and others. You may struggle with trust, feel unsettled in closeness, or find yourself reacting strongly in situations that others seem to manage with ease. Understanding these patterns can bring relief, especially when understanding alone has not been enough to change them.

How I work with trauma

In our work together, safety and containment come first. Therapy does not involve reliving experiences or pushing you to talk about things that feel too painful or overwhelming. We will only explore what you want to explore, and only at a pace that feels respectful and manageable for you. I offer this work both in London and online.

 

An important part of this work involves helping experiences feel more settled, so they no longer intrude on the present in the same way. By gently recognising how traumatic experiences are held, and by working with them carefully and gradually, it can become possible for memories to lose some of their intensity and emotional charge. Over time, they can take their place as events that happened, rather than experiences that continue to overwhelm the present.

 

You do not need to have clear or complete memories for this work to be meaningful. Many people experience the effects of trauma through emotional reactions, relationship patterns, or a sense of disconnection, rather than through specific recollections. We focus on what feels present for you now, and on understanding how past experiences continue to have an impact on your life, without needing to revisit or relive anything that feels too much.

What can change

As trauma is worked with carefully and at a pace that feels right, many people begin to feel less dominated by fear, tension, or emotional shutdown. It can become easier to stay present, to feel more choice in how you respond, and to experience a greater sense of distance from painful memories.

 

Change in this kind of work is often gradual, but it can be deeply stabilising. Over time, people often describe feeling more in control of their inner world, more connected to themselves, and more able to engage with life and relationships without constant vigilance or withdrawal.

 

You may also find it helpful to read my pages on Working with Anxiety and Working with Relationship Difficulties, as trauma often shapes both emotional regulation and patterns of relating.

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